10.05.2005

Ain't Shit Change Except Nickels and Dimes




ARE YOU READY FOR SOME BASKETBALL (Portland-stylee?). From Hoopshype/The Oregonian.

"Darius Miles arrived in a black Rolls Royce with "TAKEOVER23" on the front plates."

"Zach Randolph maintained that his weight is the same as its been in recent years, but he's obviously leaner than ever before. And when someone asked him about his surgery affecting his leaping ability, he remarked, "I never was a leaper," which got good laughs."

"It's easy to see why Martell Webster impressed the Blazers during his pre-draft interviews. He's intelligent. And can handle himself. He mentioned that he loves to read and just finished reading "Lord of the Flies" recently."


And this team expects golden boy, Nate McMillan to un-gullify the most spasmodic team in The Association? Even Joel Przybizness was getting his game on in the boxing ring this summer. THIS IS A TEAM OF YOUTH. D-Miles might be the un-college-experienced Lamar Odom. Zach Randolph is the negative space of Sean May. Martell Webster is...fuck it...SOMEONE FIND A PHOTO OF HIS AUNT/GRANDMA's DRAFT DAY PASTRY HAT.

14 Comments:

At 10/05/2005 12:26 PM, Blogger Bethlehem Shoals said...

i have long said that, when darko is finally freed, this blog's name automatically changes to "grandma webster's hat." impossible without a photo, not sure if the success of this name depends on what martell does in the league.

you'll notice that i haven't once mentioned darko's big redemption as one of those to watch for in the upcoming season. i don't know if that's a shrewd call on my part, or just not wanting to have to think about all the hassle it would cause us.

 
At 10/05/2005 12:47 PM, Blogger zlm said...

Darko boys,

just to let you know, the NBA season previews are in full effect at www.idleatwork.com . Enjoy, and leave comments

 
At 10/05/2005 1:34 PM, Blogger Bethlehem Shoals said...

did martell webster make that site? that's some pretty advanced irony for an eighteen year-old nba player

 
At 10/05/2005 1:35 PM, Blogger Bethlehem Shoals said...

the on thc linked to in the post, not idleatwork.

 
At 10/05/2005 1:36 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

This high school class in the nba is really weird because it's the first group of kids that are entirely younger than i am. It makes me realize i no longer have huge upside. It's also weird seeing martell webster just finish reading a high school literary staple. I officially feel old.

 
At 10/05/2005 1:57 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

black people love us has been around for at least 3 or 4 years. so, martell webster probably didn't make it.

 
At 10/05/2005 1:58 PM, Blogger Dr. Lawyer IndianChief said...

www.blackpeopleloveus.com was made by some people who went to my college a few years back. i just thought the deeming of martell webster as "intelligent" for (gasp) READING A BOOK was very similar to the testimonial on the website:

Johnny is generous enough to remark upon how "articulate" I am! That makes me feel good!


nonetheless, john canzano is by no means racist, and he is certainly the man (CAN YOU IMAGINE BEING THE BLAZERS BEAT WRITER)

 
At 10/05/2005 2:57 PM, Blogger zlm said...

"black people love us" was created by chelsea peretti (chelseaperetti.blogspot.com) and bobby tisdale (host of Wednesday Night's "Invite Them Up" @ Rififi. They are both kick ass comedians.

 
At 10/05/2005 5:28 PM, Blogger Brown Recluse, Esq. said...

hey THC, i got it. thought it was a very subtly made point.

canzano also pointed out that travis outlaw has made great strides in public speaking, but he "still has way to go." i'm shocked that the mississippi public schools didn't provide him with a better education.

 
At 10/05/2005 10:43 PM, Blogger Bethlehem Shoals said...

martell webster looks exactly like pusha t

 
At 10/05/2005 11:10 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

"did martell webster make that site? that's some pretty advanced irony for an eighteen year-old nba player"

yeah, because that's some HILARIOUS irony that NOBODY has used before .. i mean nobody. not derivative in the least.
sike

'tell is going to be the shit. just you watch. i'm not too confident that he'll do much besides score, but he'll have no trouble with that.

but which blazer is the most "freedarko" of them all? i thought zach randolph's irreverent attitude and violent history were pretty "freedarko" (hey, they're certainly not "bill simmons"), or that darius miles' wildly unsubstantiated popularity was also pretty "freedarko" ... and sebastian telfair must be the freest "freedarko" dude on the planet. isn't domestic abuse "freedarko"? ruben patterson anyone?

nah, i'm just fucking with you guys because you use "freedarko" like it's an adjective. it's kind of self-congratulatory.

but on the real, didn't you dudes once say darius miles was like the most "freedarko"-est dude in the league?

dang, if i want to be snippy and shit about what other dudes are writing i should just gawn head and start my own blog. i'd fit right in.

 
At 10/06/2005 1:27 AM, Blogger Dr. Lawyer IndianChief said...

Luol Dang,

Didnt you peep my recent pledge not to use "Freedarko" as an adjective as an attempt to dampen--as many have pointed out--tendencies toward self-congratulatory behavior? FEEL MY HUMILITY.

So, no, I'm not dignifying what is "Freedarko" and what isn't. And just so folks don't get it twisted, without Bill Simmons, none of us exist. We recognize that. Like KRS ONE and Gorbachev (SHOUTS TO IAN), he appears to be getting subsumed by the revolution he helped start. The game is beginning to pass him by (NO PATERNO).

 
At 10/06/2005 7:05 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

for sure THC, i think i actually read that one. like i said, i was just pulling you dudes' legs. i enjoy your blog and have been reading it for a while now, even though sometimes i don't quite agree with all of the deep analysis of basketball in a sociological context that yall boys sometimes write about. but that's all part of the freedarko charm i guess.

you're right about simmons. at first i hated him, because he would trash the knicks at every opportunity, then my brother sort of warmed me up to him, and now i hate him again. i think my big eureka moment with simmons was reading his new orleans article, when he pointed out that U2 is his favorite band. because i just don't really respect anyone's opinion who proudly admits that.

good work though dudes. if i ever get on here and talk a little shit it's all in good fun and no disrespect ever meant ...

 
At 10/06/2005 7:55 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

oh, and by the way .. luol dang: i'm taking that ...

 

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