There Ain't Just Juan Stoudamire

Or Stoudemire.

As in Amare, presentation made possible by Damon.


Damon Stodamire's resurgence this year has been wholly unexpected and completely enchanting. After a few years of decent production in the nest of anxiety that is the Portland Trail Blazers, Damon seemed to be nearing the end. Meaning - that the strange air of the sea mountains, the grungy girl you just can't shake - the lingering and festering hatchet wound that are the Trail Blazers would make Damon succumb.

They would finally break him with their communal grip of dysfunction. He's been a contributing member, but never the focus. Oh, Damon what happeth to you?

Flashback to Toronto Raptors Inaugural Season. Damon is chosen be the Rapt's first player and he is greeted with raucous boos. Response? Rookie of the Year. Isiah Thomas was clearly psychic.

Traded West. Years of irrelevance in Portland were overshadowed by the shocking behavior of his teammates. Somehow his own marijuana charges seemed to pail in comparison to Zach Randolph's history, Shawn Kemp's coke binges (crack in the locker room, too), and recently Qyntel Wood's animal abuse (for more on this, see below).

And yet the Trail Blazers got real boring real quick. A soap opera with bad ratings. They can't even spice it up. They have the most dysfunctional coach in the league outside of Jeff Van Gundy and yet by adding Abdur-Rahim who can take the air out of a balloon, a shockingly toned down Darius Miles and a Nick Van Exel who seems as though the years in Dallas broke him they have lost their zest. Did anyone even hear that Darius Miles was fueding with Maurice?

A team built on boredom because we're all tired of it. I wonder what Mo Cheek's impending flight to Philadephia will mean.

Regardless, Damon is back and with a vengeance. In the past month and a half, he has lost his starting position, regained it, and now improbably teamed with Van Exel for one of the most productive backcourts in the league.

Check it: Scored 54 on 1/14. Averaging 22 points a game in Jan and Feb. Yet, he's still dishing out dimes and is actually rebounding. Leads the league in FT %, too.

Mighty Mouse has regained his might. Good knows he's still lighting up, a story was recently told about blunts in his car. Like the newly insurgent undergroud of America, Damon Stoudamire is joining rank with the Najeh Davenports of the world who say "Where's the manure? There's no proof."

We should all be proud. Now trade him to the Knicks.


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