No, it did not feel good

Nevermind that it was Snapper Jones, of all people, who announced it to the world during halftime highlights. Or that it had already been hinted at, at least, by previous attempts at nicknaming the player in the league most desperately in need of a good one. Why this seemed such an urgent matter, I don't know; probably some combination of mounting professional rep, instant highlight-ability, and the kind of weird real name that screams out for something to be done with it.

(For the record, "Gilbert Arenas" is the only NBA name so weird that it can be its own nickname. Anything less colorful demands manipulaton.)

(Even "Amare Stoudemire" can be converted into just "Amare.")

"Iggy Hop." I hope to god this one doesn't stick. Should be a banner moment for me—the Stooges and the new Association (not the band, dumb-ass) brought together in one mildly hip gesture. Unfortunately, it left a bitter taste in my mouth that even a few sweet, sweet minutes of NFL Draft coverage (valuable only because it reminds me of the NBA's own off-season shindig) could not wash away. I don't think Iguodala wants this nickname; I don't think Stooges-vintage Iggy, the only incarnation that matters, has any special relevance to the league. I'm sure they've used something from Lust for Life on broadcasts, but that's some lowest common denominator shit, not what I expect from trashed-out rock's own apocalyptic monster and my favorite 2004-2005 rookie.

Whoever came up with this one, keep it in your pants. If I hear the Spurs called "the Ginobili Ones" tomorrow, I'm watching the rest of ABC's games on mute.

THC WAS RIGHT. Sheed is back and the Pistons are disconcertingly professional. My money's on a sweep.


Post a Comment

<< Home