9.30.2005

Flex on, Mr. Swagger


There's probably a lot of nuance to be mined in K-Mart's threat to forcibly un-retire his college jersey, take back his trophies, and wipe out his legacy for all the world to see. Most of it, though, would focus on the relationship between Hugs, Cincy, and the more orthodox basketball programs—not exactly my cup of tea. The great, flashing part of all this, though, is that K-Mart doesn't just stare down institutional power—he's flat-out denying that an institution exists in the first place. Fuck an endowment, campus, thousands of alumni. . . this is between three people: the coach, his former star, and, uh, a large state university. You heard him: it's "personal" between him and the school.

This isn't an overmatched mastermind picking apart an army, or the fearless leader imagining himself larger than life; that would be delusional. No, what we've got here is one man insisting that, when it comes to settling shit, buerecracy and sheer size still should deal like you and me. Even if it makes absolutely no sense, he wants Cincinnati to face him like a man. Watch him do with the same thing with a pro franchise if ever one tries to Reef him. And best believe that, were such a thing as the FreeDarko Power Rankings, for today he would be perched up on high, seething with greatness.

That, or it just proves that if a program's not serious about student-athletes, you can't expect them to see the university as anything more than just a bunch of classrooms trying to get in the way of superior wills, higher goals, and strength from deep within.

16 Comments:

At 9/30/2005 8:45 PM, Blogger Rocco Chappelle said...

I think Simmons and his Beantown brethren are trying to spam-bomb you guys. Suit up!!!

Anyway, how do you think K.Mart is going to react when the league institutes its dress code for all injured and woodfaring players?

I can see him standing in the rain outside of the Pepsi Center rocking his sweaty game jersey, a pair of nylon sweats with one leg rolled up to the knee, and his high school letterman's jacket (with the leather sleeves, of course) screaming, "Cooooooooowwwwwwwaaaaarrrrdddddddsssssss!!!!"

 
At 10/01/2005 11:36 AM, Anonymous aug said...

Lets chill about the simmons thing until something else comes along that needs mentioning.

I don't know how to feel about the dress code. On one hand, the players should take a bit of pride in what they wear on the sideline. There is no reason to wear basketball shorts and a tshirt, or jeans. Also, i like the idea that the players are required to interact with the fans more. I think inactive players are supposed to greet fans, sign autos and be involved in gear giveaways before games. Also, they have to be more available to the media which i'm not too keen on because of privacy issues although it'll provide more interesting quotes which i'm all about. On the other hand, all of this is a pretty slippery slope of control by david stern. This isn't as big a deal as certain players sports writers/analysts are gonna make it, but like i said, slippery slope.

I've never been a big kmart fan. He's very overrated. He made his living getting alleyoops from kidd and now that he doesn't have that, he struggled a lot on the nuggets with creating his own shot and his rebounding isn't that great. He needs andre miller to turn into cavs from 3 years ago mode.

 
At 10/01/2005 11:40 AM, Blogger Bethlehem Shoals said...

i have discovered yet another importan feature of my basketball faith: i know that k-mart is overrated, that he's nothing now. but i prefer to remember the glory days with blissful ignorance, and look at the now for whatever scraps he can give me--even if those scraps tend to turn his former achievments into mockeries of success and nothing more than high points in posturing

 
At 10/01/2005 12:47 PM, Anonymous aug said...

I'm with you. That was a fun team to watch. Which is why i was so suprised that the nets didn't draft hakim warrick, or another guy similar in the draft. Same with going after Slowmile.

 
At 10/01/2005 11:45 PM, Blogger Bethlehem Shoals said...

a. i still think jersey drafted warrick

b. since he's going to memphis, who let swift walk, is there any chance he's just a poor man's stromile? just used as one? is there any difference?

c. i have to say that it's absolutely, completely impossible that warrick doesn't become a "league favorite" (as distinct from fan favorite--league favorites tend to be far more freedarko-ish. like d-miles was one in his hay, k-mart once was one, etc.).

d. the main problem with all the players it seems like you could compare warrick to (mainly stromile and miles, i guess) is that they're raw athletes who never learned how to play ball. i think a lot of warrick's "limitations" might show exactly because, as a four-year starter with a major school, he knows how to play ball, and tries to do the appropriate thing to do even when he could probably force the issue by just dunking all the time (even on defense).

 
At 10/02/2005 1:04 AM, Blogger Bethlehem Shoals said...

for history's sake, here is the best thing anyone's ever said about k-mart. it's from the mysterious big baby, who said this past spring:

"While I'm bitching, if I hear another player say "Pick you poison" or "We got our swagger back" in these playoffs, I'm going to pants them. The only player I'll make an exception for is Kenyon Martin, who actually does swagger so much it looks like he's about to pull his own shorts off at any moment."

 
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