"We Slummin, G!"
Check the 1000 words I dropped on life and basketball up at McSweeney's today. We're celebrating our 10th article anniversary.
Not to go all self-righteous on you guys, but last night's Cavs/Wiz game reinforced my theory about the playoffs embodying all or nothing simultaneously. Just as B-Shoals (see below) can see that the contest was "sick beyond sick," I can just as easily point to that game as making me sick to my stomach. What we were watching were two inexperienced teams give us "skill by default" but at a level of athletic maturity ten times below that seen in the Kings/Spurs series ( (a) who am I? (b) the Kings/Spurs joint is by far the best series in this playoffs and more slept on than Boxcar Sessions). Nobody, outside of Gilbert--who strangely did not get the ball into his hands until the last 6 seconds of overtime--wanted to go for the jugular. LEAST of them being LeBron. To recap:
LeBron is clutch.
LeBron is not clutch.
The Wizards are poised.
The Wizards are flustered.
The Cavs/Wiz game last night was a classic. The Cavs/Wiz game last night was not a classic. Suns/Lakers Game 4 was an undeniable classic. Kobe was undeniably clutch. LeBron lost his marbles at the end of the fourth quarter and regained them with 3 seconds left in OT. Sportscenter will paint LeBron's drive (aka Jamison's folly) as a Jordan-esque moment. More thoughtful observers will construe it as the development of a man's psyche. The moment a child learns to masturbate or to catch a filet a fish with his knife and bare hands.
Perhaps I am negating my own original thesis here, trying construct a linear narrative, when again, Ol' Shoals has suggested that perhaps the Playoffs point to the uselessness of constructing anything but a PARADOXICAL narrative for any of life's events. THE HISTORY OF BONZI WELLS IS BEING RETOLD RIGHT BEFORE OUR EYES PEOPLE, his Portland days reimagined as a time of he being a key role player, his Memphis days constructed as a prelude to breaking out, his role on the Kings painted as KEY TO THE TURNAROUND. I see him merely as a tough matchup. Too big for Bowen and Manu. Too quick for Finley. Is there a truth to be told?
As a brief aside, let's say John Daly blew $20 million. Let's say Chuck blew a cool $10M. And just for good measure, let's say Wayne Gretzky's wife lost $5mil. Would anyone then doubt that the losses of the quietest man on earth are in the 9-digit range? Zen, bitch.