Unclamp your velvet
No surprises with today's McSweeney's column, wherein I consider the astoundingly familiar issue of J.R. Smith and his latest new team. Besides the obvious glee of foisting this marginal NBA player upon galleys of unsuspecting non-fans, I wanted to get my three nickels in on one Denver columnist's misguided reaction and J.R.'s myth-making Rucker move.
(By the way, anyone seeking evidence of my claims on Smith's true skill set could do worse than checking out these YouTube mixes. I know that the third is almost all dunks, but respect the fallen and what could've been. Also, #2 suffers from an unfortunate choice of soundtrack, and might be best watched with the mute button fully depressed.)
Other than that, I highly recommend a visit to Fringe Sports Central's Vegas League recap, and stay tuned here for one more message from SLC courtesy of the man with three names. Alias is photoshopped in, but the institutional authority is SO REAL.