7.02.2007

Upgrade U: From the Home of Coca-Cola, I'm Not Reffering to Soda

Real quick: please take a sec to check out Shoals in motion over here. A good round table discussion of sports blogging and life in the Fanhouse.

Now, back to our regularly scheduled programming:








INT. CONFERENCE ROOM DEEP IN THE BOWELS OF THE PHILLIPS ARENA

NBA Draft eve. Men in suits that need ironing. Papers on a table that need filing. A photograph on the wall of a smirking Ted Turner, standing in front of a vintage poster for Klute. A season on the brink. Enter: a man with a plan.






BILLY KNIGHT: Jesus! June already! What's up, number crunchers!? We figure out who's keeping the lights on in this flop house?

HAGGARD FRONT-OFFICE COG: Well, Billy, we're still facing something of a quagmire there. Mr. Belkin and the Atlanta Ownership Group are still fighting like cats and dogs--

BK: I tell you guys that the last pit I bought from Big Boi's kennel ate my wife's fucking cat! Felt like I was watching an episode of Nova! So that lends that cliche some credence!

HFOC:--...That's a damn shame there, Bill. To continue; there's real gridlock, and it's paralyzing any kind of forward progress we could make.

BK: Hey, the checks clear, right? Who gives a shit who's signing 'em, am I right, fellas!

Knight lets out a chortle the echoes through the silence of the room, the kind silence made by broken men. Then, the sound of a muffled cough...





BK: Holy hoecakes! 'Nique! Don't sneak up on me like that! You get lost on the way to a Hold 'Em game?! Ha! I know you ain't ever going all in. This cat's so cheap, when we hit Magic City he throws out quarters, saying, "I MAKE IT DRIZZLE!" It's all love, nephew!

DOMINIQUE WILKINS: [stage whispers] You know I'm gonna take your job, right, bitch?

BK: Ok! Let's play who wants to be a millionaire. I pay you guys to watch ESPN and then tell me what I should do, and I get paid to disagree with you and do whatever the fuck I want. It says here in the media guide that I'm the shot-caller and I'm pretty close to certain that I'm calling on that McRoberts kid.





HFOC: Josh...McRoberts?

BK: You gotta admit, it's got a nice ring to it! You can look at the spread sheets, Egon. I look at the name...and I like Josh. And the other two Josh's.



l-r: Josh Smith, Donta "Not Josh" "But At Least A" Smith, Josh Childress

HFOC: Billy, this franchise has significant, urgent needs. We've drafted virtually identical players over the last few years. Last year we selected Shelden Williams and the next pick was the rookie of the the year...

BK: Shelden has his uses. Right now he's on Double-Watership-Down-Low assignment.

The room stares longingly...

BK: I got the kid at the Apple spot on Peachtree getting me an iPhone! Love them Duke dudes. They aim to please!

HFOC: We haven't drafted an all-star in 23 years, sir.



BK: Who picks all-stars? People. People are really good at picking shit, ain't they? They're about to sew it up so that two families will have been running this country for the last twenty years, and when they ain't picking presidents they pick whether the bald fruit from Blossom or the juicer from Saved by the Bell is the better dancer.

HFOC: We desperately need a point guard.

BK: See, this is why your wife don't love you no more. Guess what: ERIC SNOW BEEN TO THE FINALS TWICE THIS DECADE. Fuck point guards. We got Salim Stoudamire, right?

HFOC: Aside from the fact that you vetoed a trade for Amare Stoudemire on the basis that it would look stupid having two guys with the same name on their jerseys..even though their names are spelled differently...

BK: I stand by that.

HFOC: Salim is hardly a pass-first player. He's a Black Hole.

BK: Why he gotta be black, asshole?! We need a point guard like my credit rating needs another night buying out the bar at Terry Pendleton's Grown & Sexy Night.



BK: We need a resolution. Here's the 411: I'm gonna sell some Blackstone stock and hire Stephen Hawking out of my own pocket to work on the Salim Black Hole problem you're worried about.



Fuck a triangle. We're installing the quantum gravity offense.


BK: Next: With the 11 slot, take Acie Law because dude sounds like a a minor character from Gunsmoke and that shit was boss hog. If the Chinese kid will change his name to The Outlaw Josey Wales, grab him at 3, make everybody wear cowboy hats and change the name of the Philipps to the OK Corral. Otherwise take Horford because he looks he eats fucking metal folding chairs for breakfast.

HFOC: Jesus Christ. That's actually a pretty decent plan.

BK: No shit, Raymond Chandler. I got crazy visions. They thought Napoleon was crazy when he wanted to invade Russia. History will prove me, like that little fighting French genius, right. I gotta tee-time to make. If you need me, I still got my pager on. I'm expecting a call from 1983. When Shelden gets back tell him to make "Rock Yo Hips" my fucking ringtone. Hawks '08: We're the Crime Mob in Dream Team Colors.





93 Comments:

At 7/02/2007 4:27 PM, Anonymous analog said...

billups, don't ever stop being amazing.

 
At 7/02/2007 4:44 PM, Anonymous chris said...

I'm gonna to take those jerseys as a sign that Stern is looking at contraction for the Hawks and Bobcats. Its really the only sensible thing to do at this point.

And, how the hell did the Hawks not draft Julian Wright? He had everything they want: 6-8, name starts with 'J', no set position. Stick to the script, BK. Work your plan. Work your plan.

 
At 7/02/2007 4:48 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

hilarious

 
At 7/02/2007 4:52 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

So, Seattle goes to LV.
NO to OKC.
Charlotte ends up in St. L.
And the Hawks? Louisville bound.

Give it 20 years, it'll happen. All of it.

 
At 7/02/2007 5:26 PM, Blogger Dan said...

I'm imagining this whole thing starring puppets a la the Interdependence Day film.

 
At 7/02/2007 5:41 PM, Blogger Doug said...

it's all awesome, but that "Outlaw Josey Wales" reference was the nail in the coffin, in a good way. Brilliant.

as are the photo captions.

 
At 7/02/2007 6:21 PM, Blogger Ty Keenan said...

Brilliant. I second the Outlaw Josey Wales bit as the best part.

Someone needs to get a photo of Bogut, Villanueva, and Yi in ponchos and hats. I'm not sure who would be good, bad, and ugly (well, that one I know).

The Stoudemire/Stoudamire jersey issue is as logical as any reason I've heard for the Hawks not doing that trade.

 
At 7/02/2007 6:34 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Childress looks like plastic, while Josh Smith's face screams, "I AM the pitbull that ate his wife's fucking cat."

 
At 7/02/2007 7:07 PM, Blogger Brickowski said...

I laughed so much harder reading this post than I did during HBO's entire Entourage/Conchords hour last night. Billups = Highlight Factory.

I'm moving to Atlanta at the end of the month (and by Atlanta I mean Athens), and I'm pretty enthused about having these Hawks nearby. For a second I even considered abandoning the Spurs for the Hawk bandwagon (winning rings all the time gets kinda tedious) if Amare landed there. What really had me was the way dude acted like it was no big deal if the powerhouse Suns dealt him to the NBA equivalent of a third world country. Alas, it didn't go down (not that I'd ever be capable of betraying my black and silver roots) but I almost thinks the Hawks are better for it. Horford and Law seem destined to have productive careers leading title-contenders, and that's something you shouldn't be saying about 2 rookies who just joined the Hawks. And while Amare's indifference was refreshing in contrast to Kobe's whining or Marion's vetoing, it also made me think, especially coming on the heels of his recent playoff meltdown, that he'll probably never lead a team to a title.

 
At 7/02/2007 7:13 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

When Amare was putting up 40/15 games (in the playoffs!) with ease, I bought it. Now? Not so much.

 
At 7/02/2007 8:04 PM, Blogger JTExperience said...

Crime Mob in Dream Team colors. Off tha fucking chain.

 
At 7/02/2007 8:14 PM, Blogger Brickowski said...

I know. And I may need to start playing fantasy baseball just to name the team Terry Pendleton's Grown & Sexy Night.

 
At 7/02/2007 8:15 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

why is Joe Don Baker on Hawking's left?

 
At 7/02/2007 9:23 PM, Blogger nerditry said...

I dream of having enough swag to show up at TP's Grown and Sexy wearing a shorts and shirt outfit all the same pattern. Matching dyed gators and a bowler hat.

It's the 1996 draft lottery every night!

 
At 7/02/2007 9:50 PM, Blogger T. said...

Guess the Chinese kid's agent didn't want him to change his name.

If I had a band, I'd name it Terry Pendleton's Grown & Sexy.

 
At 7/02/2007 11:04 PM, Blogger Nate said...

Yo Nerditry,

Make sure that matching shirt/short combo is linen. Middle age black men love matching linen 'fits. Especially in the summer. I must have counted a thousand or so combos at the playboy jazz fest here in l.a. a few weeks back.

And Billups: That Pendelton line was a classic.

 
At 7/03/2007 12:48 AM, Blogger Brickowski said...

So, Shard to the Magic? Darko's search for a home continues...

 
At 7/03/2007 1:12 AM, Anonymous Atta said...

Darko has, in fact, finally been freed. End site?

 
At 7/03/2007 1:24 AM, Anonymous crmdk said...

yah, I love Clint Eastwood (second only to the immortal Lee Marvin and, uh, Alain Delon) but the best line has got to be "fuck a triangle. we're installing the quantum gravity offense." that blew my mind. the eeriness is that the concept of Stephen Hawking teaching JJ, Josh Smith and Co. super-advanced physics doesn't even seem too out of the ordinary, just another facet of Billy Knight's twisted genius and Josh Childress is a doppelganger for Bubblegum Tate. I'm now mentally prepared to see JJ and the Williams Brothers transporting through the Salim Black Hole to get open. Hawks/Warriors games next season aren't even going to be recognizable as basketball.

But has Darko been freed from himself? Seriously, I'm really hoping the Bulls can pick him up. Everyone forgets that dude is still just 22 and he was on the verge of a breakout season last year. I can see him putting up 13 and 8 with a couple of assists and blocks if he gets the playing time next year.

 
At 7/03/2007 2:58 AM, Blogger Ty Keenan said...

Durant could average 25 for that team next year and only have a decent year. Is it also possible that Wally goes for 20? That would be depressing.

One of Childress's email addresses in college was realdeal@stanford.edu. I'd gladly accept a Billups conversation between him and J. Smith.

 
At 7/03/2007 4:48 AM, Blogger Ty Keenan said...

Darko will be free when he hits a three.

Not to go off-topic too much, but I think John from Cincinnati is the most FD tv show of all-time. Style and substance in a constant struggle there. The Wire is better, of course.

 
At 7/03/2007 9:00 AM, Anonymous JCN said...

I'll co-sign on that Ty...that show is undeniably fighting a constant battle over substance v. style.

It will never take the place of my beloved Sopranos but it eases the pain of no longer having Tony around.

 
At 7/03/2007 3:41 PM, Anonymous Sean said...

Gilbert Arenas + Alberto Gonzales =

Gilberto Garenas.

 
At 7/03/2007 6:22 PM, Anonymous Kaifa said...

Wow, from Slam (via Truehoop): Marbury going crazy on the TV show Mike'd Up.

Slam article:
http://slamonline.com/online/2007/07/stephon-marbury-is-the-good-kind-of-crazy/

Video:
http://slamonline.com/online/2007/07/the-stephon-marbury-video/

There's just no joke you can make to top this performance.

 
At 7/03/2007 9:18 PM, Blogger BW said...

Random.

The lady friend works at McCormick and Schmicks (SEAFOOD FINE DINING) in Atlanta and Billy comes in from time to time.

He is (she says):
(a) a decent tipper.
(b) fairly reserved but generally friendly.
(c) slightly forgetful.

A month and a half ago, I received the text "I recognize most of these... but who's Matt Harpring??"

Billy had left his entire nba.com gm survey ballot at the table. Nothing too shocking - although Harpring being top-3 for sixth man of the year caught me by surprise.

Kobe was third on his MVP ballot.

Pretty much everything how you would imagine it.

That's all.

 
At 7/03/2007 11:27 PM, Anonymous JCN said...

Kaifa:

That shit is banana's. Where do you start?

Seriously, what the hell is Starbury on?

 
At 7/03/2007 11:37 PM, Blogger Ben Q. Rock said...

Harpring's a Georgia Tech guy. Does Knight know that?

And yes, Darko has indeed been freed. His agent won't let him play for the Magic because he says GM Otis Smith is "deceitful". Okay. Enjoy that mid-level exception, Darko.

 
At 7/04/2007 12:17 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ben, are you saying Darko can't get 6mil a year, when there are teams MORE desperate than the NJN?

 
At 7/04/2007 4:02 PM, Blogger Ben Q. Rock said...

The Bucks, Bobcats, and Grizzlies are the only teams that can offer Darko $8-10 million, which is what he wants. If they aren't interested, and if the Bulls don't renounce Andres Nocioni to make room for him, Darko is going to have to take the mid-level exception somewhere. He won't get the money or the playing time he wants, and he'll sit on the bench and pout until he becomes a free-agent again.

I don't understand why you brought up the Nets.

 
At 7/04/2007 4:50 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

"The Bucks, Bobcats, and Grizzlies are the only teams that can offer Darko $8-10 million, which is what he wants."

The MLE is expected to be around 6mil. I'm saying there are desperate teams that will give him more money than that. Do you disagree? Because if you do, I'd love to see you run an NBA franchise, I really would.

I brought up the Nets because they are one of those teams desperate for help with the bigs, unless you think Smokey Williams and Josh Boone can play 40 minutes a night. Even if they can't afford it. You telling me Memphis isn't backing down from the Nocioni/Varejao deals and eyeing Darko to pair with Gasol? They absolutely fucking are.

He WILL get a MLE and more dude. He's as good as gone, and the Magic will likely live to regret it (although it will be interesting to see Rashard take 10-15 threes a night).

 
At 7/04/2007 6:21 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Imagine a Rashard/Kirilenko/Young Thunda frontcourt. I'm skeered.

 
At 7/04/2007 11:21 PM, Anonymous William de Worde said...

How about we just have the Pistons offer Darko their MLE, since Dumars kindly misplaced his phone when time came to pick a big man. If that were to occur, does it become the exact oppositte of FD (now starting to wonder just what that is...A-Rod? Shaq?) or would it be SO un-FD that it becomes FD by design and desire?

Entirely unrelated, Pistons' added Ibby Jabber to their Vegas Summer League team. I want him and "Eats Babies" Maxiel to room together for a quick reality show - and Ivy League grad and a former UC Dumbcat. The hilarity might never end.

With Darko now free, perhaps change said name to Free Pat Burrell?

 
At 7/05/2007 2:38 AM, Blogger Ty Keenan said...

I have to agree with anon.; it would be very unlikely for Darko to get nothing more than MLE. Wouldn't upset me to see Mullin use part of the trade exception to get him if convincing Gerald Wallace to sign for less than 10 mil in the first year turns out to be impossible.

 
At 7/05/2007 9:55 AM, Blogger Darnell Bond said...

Fulton County just became the center of the universe because Acie Law has balls that are the size of planets. Dude can and will take and make the big shot. Good pickup for the Hawks. Great blog, too.

 
At 7/05/2007 1:34 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

When you said the Hawks haven't drafted an all-star in 23 years, you must have forgot that they drafted Pau Gasol earlier this decade.

 
At 7/05/2007 8:04 PM, Blogger Kevin Hayward said...

oops, type-o in the title. "Reffering"

 
At 7/06/2007 12:28 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm not trying to be needy, but where is the freedarko summer league preview? you guys off for the summer? fair enough if you are, but spare me the pain of checking in every two hours...my job already sucks enough.

 
At 7/06/2007 6:28 PM, Blogger crazylegsjackson said...

KD is playing. Come watch the game change:

http://www.nba.com/summerleague2007/scoreboard.jsp

 
At 7/07/2007 2:08 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Greg Oden: 6 points, 2 rebounds, 10 fouls.

LaMarcus Aldridge: 26 points, 11 rebounds, 4 fouls.

Shiiiiiiiiiiit.

 
At 7/07/2007 6:07 AM, Blogger aeneas said...

J Hodge started center 10 rebounds 14 points

he's free now

 
At 7/07/2007 1:55 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ya know, who tha fuck DOES wanna play in Milwaukee? Maurice Williams is praying for a bigger contract offer elsewhere...

 
At 7/07/2007 2:37 PM, Anonymous Kaifa said...

Fundamentals appreciation alert!

Did anybody else get excited for a second over Durant's fade-away fake to leaning floater under a defender's arm? Might he be a 4 after all and could he become what KG should have?

 
At 7/07/2007 3:13 PM, Anonymous aug said...

I like how the best game out of the rookies was Yi Jianlian. Not that summer leagues mean anything, and he was playing with his national team who he's familiar with, but it's just kinda funny since he is every media person's automatic bust prediction. Zhi Zhi Wang is a beast in international play, too. He's still riding the pine in my nba2k franchise, but he's waiting for his moment.

 
At 7/07/2007 5:31 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Off topic... This League needs 2 new expansion teams. There is far too much talent out there to have less teams than a league like the NFL that fields 22 starting players.

Maybe then the 2nd round of the draft would have more significance. And there would be less unfortunate players that get sent over to Europe right out of college.

St. Louis, Las Vegas, Oklahoma City, Kansas City, and Vancouver are some obvious spots for new teams. I would love to see it happen.

 
At 7/07/2007 5:55 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Vancouver won't get a team again soon. OKC and Vegas look like guarantees.

 
At 7/07/2007 6:15 PM, Blogger EL MIZ said...

the nba would be a LOT better off if they contracted the bobcats, hornets, hawks, and grizzlies. then have an expansion draft with those teams.

how much better would the nba be if, in the expansion draft, boston took pau, the bucks took chris paul, the sonics took emeka okafor, the t'wolves took josh smith, the blazers took mike conley, the knicks took tyson chandler, the kings could take ray felton, the 76ers could put al horford in their front court, etc etc. adding two more teams is absurd, watch some espn classic and peep how deep and loaded teams of the 80s were.

 
At 7/07/2007 6:32 PM, Blogger The Electric Zarko said...

Bellinelli with 37 on 14-20 shooting!

At one point in the second quarter he was 9-10 and 4-5 for 3s.

Pity to see B.Wright on the DNP list though.

 
At 7/07/2007 8:58 PM, Blogger Ty Keenan said...

This league definitely doesn't need more expansion teams. Pretty much every major sport needs contraction. Finals teams should not look like the Cavs.

NBA TV better reshow the Warriors game.

 
At 7/08/2007 1:27 AM, Blogger Mr. Six said...

Not as nice as seeing it on TV, but it looks like nba.com is making the games available on-line (after the fact, not just live, as previously noted):

http://www.nba.com/video/index.html

 
At 7/08/2007 3:52 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

http://youtube.com/watch?v=pNxZ4_O8R8M

Belinelli is as FD as they come.

 
At 7/08/2007 6:00 PM, Blogger Ty Keenan said...

I've been in love with Marco's youtubes for weeks, but watching that game really showed that he's not just a jump shooter and is willing to drive on people pretty often. And that release is unbelievably fast. Unnecessary fadeaways have to be FD.

 
At 7/08/2007 7:44 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

http://www.nba.com/media/germany/bwb_site_top_070706.jpg
This photo needs to go on an NBA blog NOW. Preferably with snarky, racist comments.

Foyle feels his people.

 
At 7/08/2007 7:46 PM, Anonymous padraig said...

Yeah, Marco, he had kind of a mediocre season in the Italian league and Euroleague play and I'm kinda wondering if Nellie wasn't sending him undetectable telepathic communiques to sort of suck a little bit, temporarily, so his stock would fall and the W's could nab him. I know everybody was talking about Yi as a genetically engineered Nellieball-mutant, but Belinelli has got to be pretty high up on the Nellie wet dream list as well. His absurdly quick release w/the funky leg kick, like he's contorting his body but somehow maintaining balance and perfect mechanics, is definitely hella FD-perfect form that looks totally weird. Also, he kind of looks like Andris' shorter big brother with a constantly super-flushed face. I'm confident it's merely another step in Nellie's inevitable march towards world domination. First the Baltics, now Italy; I'm sure that next year the GSW will be all over the next athletic 6'6" swingman out of Mongolia or Peru.

Nellieball is merely a harbinger of the stateless, classless utopia that awaits us...or he'll just reretire and spend out the rest of his days getting slushed on a beach in Hawaii. Either way.

 
At 7/08/2007 8:08 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Javaris Crittenton just totally outplayed Jordan Farmar. Eep.

 
At 7/08/2007 9:20 PM, Anonymous JCN said...

ha...so i'm at my buddies house watching the Braves game on ESPN. They interview TP and i can't stop laughing because all i can think about is Billups' classic line of "Terry Pendleton's Grown & Sexy Night".

Needless to say my explanation left my friend confused.

At least you can can appreciate the humor.

 
At 7/09/2007 12:51 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Man, the fanhouse get 4 posts this morning by Shoals and we get nothing?!?

 
At 7/09/2007 12:53 PM, Blogger Bethlehem Shoals said...

if all of you want to band together and pay me to do freedarko, you'd have had a post several hours ago. as is, you'll have to wait till later today. but don't worry, the subject is there and the sinkhole is twirling.

 
At 7/09/2007 1:06 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Teehee, maybe you need one of those lame donation counters up in the header of the website. As long as it's not paypal, I'd consider it.

 
At 7/09/2007 4:57 PM, Anonymous NW Narcissist said...

You know we'd pay you to do freedarko. Set some shit up.

 
At 7/09/2007 5:12 PM, Blogger Bethlehem Shoals said...

let me look into it . . . i don't just want to have it sit up there and make me look unloved. but if people are willing to, so to speak, pay for freedarko, it could open up all sorts of possibilities.

i'm imagining something like a donation widget, and then i wouldn't write if no money came in or something.

or is that blackmail?

 
At 7/09/2007 5:25 PM, Blogger Bethlehem Shoals said...

okay dudes, next time i put up a post (probably tomorrow) i'm going to be putting some sort of widget in the top right-hand corner. i am having trouble finding one that doesn't run through paypal, but i will keep looking.

anyway, it will be simple: regular readers, throw me a few dollars now and then, or a dollar whenever i post, or whatever. the main point here is that, if i'm actually getting paid to do freedarko, i can concentrate on writing for here.

if anyone thinks this is monstrously unfair, speak up before all changes tomorrow.

 
At 7/09/2007 5:33 PM, Anonymous Sean said...

I don't think it's unfair at all. But I'm wondering: are we nearing the end of Free Darko as we know it?

 
At 7/09/2007 5:38 PM, Blogger Bethlehem Shoals said...

if i can get a decent chunk of change for writing this each month, it will be that much better than ever. otherwise, i have less time to devote to it and less wits about me when i do.

THE NPR OF THIS SHIT.

 
At 7/09/2007 5:39 PM, Anonymous NW Narcissist said...

The blackmail tip is totally FD.

 
At 7/09/2007 6:18 PM, Blogger looj said...

"Hawks '08: We're the Crime Mob in Dream Team Colors" - Now that's a slogan i can get behind

 
At 7/09/2007 6:28 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

"Alright guys, we are down to just $20 left for this donation period! Become a member of the Freedarko.com community today! A lot of people think most of our funding comes from AOL, but the fact is, the most important support comes from YOU, the readers. Maybe you find yourself grinning to a story over your morning coffee, or maybe you told a friend recently about something you read on Freedarko.com. If you enjoy Freedarko, help support it for in your community. Alright, our goal has been reached! Bethlehem will now begin drafting a tantalizing essay entitled, "FD Relativity: A study comparing the SE and SW divisions, or why I can't stop loving the 3-point bomb."

Ya know what, I can't wait.

 
At 7/09/2007 8:26 PM, Anonymous Happy in Haifa said...

Help Us Afro-Samurai!
Pay for that?
Fuck A Goat, King David.

 
At 7/09/2007 9:17 PM, Blogger Bethlehem Shoals said...

hih, i have no fucking idea what that means, but suspect it's negative. sorry.

look, i'm not saying people have to pay to read freedarko. that would be lame. i'm saying that, if you like reading freedarko, give me some money so i can keep writing it. otherwise, read it anyway and feel vaguely guilty about it.

 
At 7/09/2007 10:56 PM, Anonymous JCN said...

i'm torn. getting blackmailed to read FD makes total sense tome from a FD standpoint, but i would hate to have to pay.

The fact that it's free to everyone and can be interpreted by all who stop by makes it all the more enjoyable to me. I have no qualms about paying a small subscription fee (maybe 4.99/mo?)but that seems like it would eventually drive people away and thus bring down the quality of the responses.

Just my 2 cents. I'm down either way.

Keep Darko Free.

 
At 7/09/2007 11:40 PM, Anonymous westney said...

Fee Darko.

Guess it had to end sometime...

*but wait*

It's fucking July and the only thing to write about is what kind of sock contract Thaddeus Young is going to get offered and how much money Desagana is going to make off his new "Diop-step" move. So let's all relax and trust that once the league gets back to business as usual and our preferred purveyors of eso-ball start making some FD noises around November we'll all be happy to be here again.

 
At 7/10/2007 12:45 AM, Blogger Bethlehem Shoals said...

DUDES

UNDERSTAND

if i did this, no one would HAVE to pay to read FD. it would simply be a way of paying a little bit each month so that you could be ensured the maximum freedarko experience day-in, day-out.

people who don't feel like paying don't have to, but that means less time i have for freedarko.

i don't think that's so bold and unreasonable.

 
At 7/10/2007 1:48 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Just kill the site and let it go out with a little class... Bow out with the FD version of the Black Album and do not come back.
This site is starting to remind me of wrestling when the Rock started doing movies but still tried to pretend he was into getting thrown around for a fraction of the money that hollywood was offering.
Not sure if wrestling is FD but who gives a fuck the site is ending anyway.

Uno

 
At 7/10/2007 1:55 AM, Blogger Bethlehem Shoals said...

wow, i had thought that the reaction to this might be "wouldn't it be great if freedarko were a self-sustaining venture that allowed its writers freedom to try their hardest." apparently i was wrong.

 
At 7/10/2007 1:59 AM, Blogger T. said...

Shoals - don't let the naysayers say nay. I'd be more than willing to throw down a couple of bucks. Those who disagree are only representing themselves.

Or, if I might - come out with a couple of new t-shirts. Up the price so you're making a reasonable profit on that. I'd pay for that. of course, I represent an interested party of one as well. It's difficult to get a feel for the collective commentators of the FreeDarko nation. No one can agree on what FD means in the first place.

 
At 7/10/2007 2:06 AM, Blogger Ty Keenan said...

I would pay what I could, but will there be a suggested donation like at a museum? (Imagining the FD Museum is awesome, by the way.) I have no concept of what would be appropriate.

Speaking of t-shirts, is the ordering information for the original one still the same?

 
At 7/10/2007 3:13 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

won't work, man. it's like a public good problem i had in econ once. it'd be great if instead of having to assign taxes we could just say, "if everyone dropped a couple bucks for the new park when they get a chance we'd really appreciate it." But we all know we'd just wait for all the other assholes to drop their bucks in for the park and keep all our bucks for ourselves.

Look, once in a while one of those really hardcore guys might leave you two bucks, but that's like eight bucks a month. I'd hope fanhouse pays more than that.

 
At 7/10/2007 3:21 AM, Blogger Brickowski said...

At some point a long time ago (say 17 months) I came to the realization that someday FreeDarko would come to an end and my daily life would be a little worse for it. I was aware that in past lives Shoals had burned out on music and politics, and figured he would ultimately run out of things to say on the specific subject that is FD. That hasn't happened yet, and I'm thankful for it.

I can't understand any bitching about a VOLUNTARY donation system that will potentially allow this site to remain as strong as it has always been. This won't affect anyone's life in a negative way. If you can't afford to donate or don't feel like it, don't. It really is that simple.

Shoals and crew devote a lot of their time to putting together original pieces that change the way you view the Association. Shit ain't easy, and I've experienced it firsthand. The time required to find quality pics was usually enough by itself to dissuade me from writing a post, let alone the time needed to struggle with, flesh out and compose the actual writing. I have no doubt that Shoals has churned out numerous posts on days when it was the last thing he felt like doing. Right now there is a giant corporation that's willing to pay him for his words on the league, provided that he puts them in an abbreviated, somewhat watered-down form, and delivers them to a forum filled with awful people incapable of adding anything to the discourse. I have no doubt that you, like me, prefer the unKut Shoals on FreeDarko, and I imagine that he prefers writing for Free Darko. But the hometeam discount only goes so far, and it's unrealistic to expect anyone to continue working day after day for free when they have better offers.

 
At 7/10/2007 3:28 AM, Blogger Brickowski said...

As someone who has never paid for ESPN Insider and chose to spend time guessing at TimesSelect passwords (remarkably easy, btw) I have doubts about whether such a donation system would work, but that's for another time. If Shoals is willing to give this a go, everyone else should let him.

 
At 7/10/2007 4:21 AM, Blogger EL MIZ said...

free renaldo.

 
At 7/10/2007 7:22 AM, Anonymous bernard snowy said...

there's nothin' wrong with donations. if freedarko dies before I get cable and am finally able to actually watch NBA games on a regular basis, I am going to be inconsolable

 
At 7/10/2007 9:57 AM, Blogger stopmikelupica said...

Wow, just got back here, and man, is this a little depressing. I agree with everything Brickowski said. Yet I also question whether such a system could work. But if you want to try it, Shoals, I'll support you.

Is there any other route you could go? Is the advertising on your site not making as much as AOL is paying? Is the advertising on the site as maximized as it could be? What other options, if any, are there? Hey, if you guys don't like Shoals' idea, get some creative suggestions, okay? Stop bitching, and start thinking... the man deserves to get paid somehow.

Oh, and even though I haven't been around in two weeks, or read anything but the last 10 comments: I agree with everything Billups has said, and disagree with everything Brown Recluse has said.

 
At 7/10/2007 10:19 AM, Blogger MC Welk said...

"read it anyway and feel vaguely guilty about it"

Shoals, vis-a-vis the Association

 
At 7/10/2007 11:38 AM, Anonymous padraig said...

another dude who would be entirely happy to voluntarily donate a few bucks each month to FD. seriously, what FD reader hasn't at some point put countless hours into a band or a blog or some other worthy endeavor that pays absolutely nothing? reason #1782 why industrial capitalism hella, hella sucks.

who else is going to enlighten us about the platonic virtues of Gerald Wallace? SNAGL alone makes FD worth it.

 
At 7/10/2007 2:00 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

personally, i'd be very unhappy to see this site go away and would gladly fork over some cash to see that it didn't happen. alternately, could you at least leave the comments open and link to your aol posts so i didn't have to discuss with the lowbrows at fanhouse?

 
At 7/10/2007 2:11 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

The only issue I see is that interview you gave in which you claimed that the difference between the longforms and the genuine article was that you spend way more time and energy on the paid stuff. Is this relative? Would you spend X% more time on the freebie depending on the amount readers paid compared to the fanhouse? I always thought that the good thing about the freedarko was that it could be used as "marketing" for your paid work. Whatever. Get money. Max contract. You like nice things too.

 
At 7/10/2007 2:18 PM, Blogger Bethlehem Shoals said...

i am looking for a way to turn freedarko into a semi-paid outlet, so i can justifiably devote lots of time to it each day. i could do two posts a day, read my posts more than once, and even do shit like go after credentials.

this is my ideal mode of basketball writing. it's more natural than any paid work. if it made me some money, i could spend more time on it, and it would be a win/win for everyone.

 
At 7/10/2007 3:03 PM, Anonymous trouc said...

do it man. there's gotta be some tangible reward though, like a exclusive free tshirt with a 1year subscription, or autographed shoals baby pictures for everybody who donates

 
At 7/10/2007 3:28 PM, Anonymous iverson fan said...

I completely understand the hardship that comes with spending time on a project while suffering from lack of pay. That being said, I've never paid to look at porn on the internet, let alone pay to read a blog or anything like that. I would probably be one of those reading in guilt.

The fact of the matter is that people need to buy some fucking T-shirts. Or up the ads. I have no idea how that works.

 
At 7/10/2007 3:40 PM, Anonymous ryan said...

trouc's idea isn't bad. have a base monthly membership that entails one to an exclusive "members only" column on the subject of your choosing once a month or so. there are ways of getting this done.

 
At 7/10/2007 3:51 PM, Anonymous Sweat of Ewing said...

WPTR (Would Pay To Read)

 
At 7/10/2007 3:55 PM, Blogger Brown Recluse, Esq. said...

"Whatever. Get money. Max contract. You like nice things too."

more like, "you like to have a roof over your head and food on the table."

 
At 7/10/2007 4:09 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oh come now recluse. Don't give me that starving artist nonsense. You'll make me want to start donating my money and time to a truly needy cause rather than some obsessive basketball fans with grad degrees. If you can't keep a roof over your head because of the blog, then you need more help than a few paypal contributions could provide.

 
At 4/13/2009 4:36 AM, Blogger 平平 said...

^^Thanks!!

婚前徵信婚姻感情大陸抓姦外遇抓姦法律諮詢家暴婚前徵信尋人感情挽回大陸抓姦離婚工商徵信婚前徵信外遇抓姦感情挽回尋人大陸抓姦離婚家暴工商徵信法律諮詢跟蹤工商徵信婚前徵信感情挽回外遇抓姦法律諮詢家暴尋人大陸抓姦離婚大陸抓姦外遇尋人家暴工商徵信法律諮詢家暴感情挽回大陸抓姦外遇婚前徵信離婚尋人工商徵信外遇抓姦法律諮詢家暴婚前徵信大陸抓姦尋人感情挽回外遇抓姦婚前徵信感情挽回尋人大陸抓姦工商徵信法律諮詢離婚家暴工商徵信外遇抓姦法律諮詢家暴婚前徵信尋人感情挽回大陸抓姦離婚婚前徵信工商徵信外遇抓姦尋人離婚家暴大陸抓姦感情挽回法律諮詢離婚感情挽回婚前徵信外遇抓姦家暴尋人工商徵信外遇抓姦法律諮詢家暴婚前徵信尋人感情挽回">徵大陸抓姦離婚婚前徵信工商徵信外遇抓姦尋人離婚家暴大陸抓姦感情挽回法律諮詢

 

Post a Comment

<< Home