Each Day Is a Lifetime, 8.13.08

-In an interview with the A.V. Club, Woody Allen shares his feelings on this year's Knicks. A key passage, carved out of a much longer answer:

WA: What I'd like the Knicks to develop into is a team that's fun and that's colorful and that you really like to watch every night, which is the way they were many years ago. It was fun to watch them, because they didn't just pile up wins in unappealing ways.

AVC: Like the [San Antonio] Spurs.

WA: Yeah. I'd really rather be entertained and have them come in second than be bored stiff and see them grind to a first-place finish.

-I have no idea if this is done by someone who doesn't know shit about sports, or only knows about sports. Or maybe the rumors are true, and youth culture has truly passed me by. Ray Allen is totally Kathy Acker. Last year's Sonics were like a Sonics reunion. Stop me when you start slipping on the trail of drool. (BS, via FanHouse)

-I've been pumping the air horn for Delonte West all summer, and now suddenly feel quite stupid about it. Presuming this rumor pans out. In every way, Mo Williams is a superior, more solid player. Then again, how bleak is it that Mo Williams—capable, occasionally explosive, not leaking left and right—seems like the key that unlocks Cleveland's championship dreams? Or is it a testament to Bron's ever-mounting might?

-I keep asking myself "why doesn't Iguodala play for Nigeria?" Not that I know anything about international basketball. Or am unaware that he's been a part of the Select Team. But if Chris Kaman will don the colors of a country he's never heard of, why wouldn't Iggy have tried to become the savior of Lagos, just this once? Would that preclude him jumping to the USA in 2012? This is just indicative of everything that bugs me about him (contract aside): He could be a totally weird, innovative player, like a smaller, more explosive, less precious Diaw. Instead, he's a passive swingman with some fundamentals. I want allies, not martyrs or shining lights for Tony Allen.

BR: They should convince someone with no chance of making Team USA--say, Rafer Alston--to get dual citizenship with Nigeria. How does Nigeria not beat everyone in Africa with this team?

PG: Rafer Alston
SG: Ime Udoka
SF: Andre Iguodala
PF: Emeka Okafor
C: Obinna Ekezie (played at Maryland, started 31 games for the Hawks in 04-05)

(Although, I guess Okafor is ineligible because he rode the pine for the Americans in Athens.)

BS: Wait, you get ineligible for shit like that?

BR: You can only represent one team in national competition. At least, that's how it works for soccer. Assume it's the same for the Olympics.

BS: So Iguodala on the Select Team would mean no Nigeria for him?

BR: That's not technically international competition, right?

Amateur, off-base psychology time. Wasn't Andre's dad Nigerian, but he abandoned him, and he was raised by his African-American mother and stepfather? Maybe he doesn't feel any connection to Nigeria, and in fact, rejects it?

BS: On draft night, there was some dude at his table in a gigantic print robe/head-dress combo. My barely educated guess was that dude was Nigerian.

-I've been wanting to post this all week, and believe it or not, I keep getting tripped up by the complexity of the argument I want to use it to make.

We can argue all day about just how different athletes area from porn stars, but I'd argue that acting schlubby around the house runs more counter to their image than something comparably mundane would be an NBA player. And yet I think it's remarkably effective in enhancing the brand, or whatever the kids say when you're tugged from two directions. (BS)

-I'm going to buy up the domain name www.draperized.com when I can think of what do with it. Hopefully you all get this joke.

-I had some other thoughts to share on my lack of Olympic crushes, and my complicated relationship with Stacey from What Not to Wear, but this post has already seen more lady-objectification than the previous three years of FreeDarko. So we'll skip that. Stay tuned for our epic discussion of men's gymnastics.



At 8/13/2008 6:12 PM, Blogger Christopher said...

This was good. Thanks for keeping me entertained at my crappy job Shoalsy. I really hope Delonte gets to comeback to cleveland, he and Lebron seemed to get along so well. I'm sorta scared of that chick from What not to wear. I think she would throw all my Lemar and Dauley shirts out the window, then make me watch as she burned all my nikes before dressing me like an eastcoast pretty boy. The question is...would she do me afterwards? Sorry.
PS: Draperized?

At 8/13/2008 6:30 PM, Blogger Teddy said...

BS, are you really thrown by that meta-hipster post? Nothing is hipper than mocking hipsters, with the possible exception of being a hipster. Alright, maybe it is confusing.

At 8/13/2008 10:41 PM, Blogger Alex said...

Holy shit. I can't believe you guys have a book. I know i'm probably super late to the party but congrats on all the success i'm sure no one saw coming 3 years or so ago. Can't wait to pick up the book.


At 8/13/2008 10:44 PM, Blogger goathair said...

I would have never guessed that a post I randomly Google shared would be linked by Fanhouse and then discussed on FreeDarko. I will say CRLS is a smart guy who is a big Spurs fan. And keeping in the HRO tradition, it's a takedown of what hipsters value.

At 8/13/2008 11:30 PM, Blogger stopmikelupica said...

Woody Allen doesn't realize that the 90's Knicks were the original version of Duncan's Spurs, minus the rings?!?

At 8/14/2008 1:30 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Behold the swingman duplication:
Not only Iggy & Ime, but Kelenna Azubuike has dual citizenship with the US and Nigeria. I can't figure out Skip's inclusion on that team tho? I thought he was from Queens and so far Google isn't enlightening me as to that.

wv: ncknzfsl- Nowitzki's debut on Kompakt

At 8/14/2008 1:57 AM, Blogger MC Welk said...

As of tonight, I have a complicated relationship with Tamron Hall of MSNBC, something about the way she explained Phelps' intake of calories.

trbwu: Tamron rids Barack's wife of undergarments.

At 8/14/2008 8:45 AM, Blogger Brown Recluse, Esq. said...

@tre: did you miss this line?

They should convince someone with no chance of making Team USA--say, Rafer Alston--to get dual citizenship with Nigeria.

I couldn't think of any Nigerian point guards, but in international play, sometimes random people join random teams just to play, like J.R. Holden, who plays for Russia, even though he has no other ties there except that he plays pro for CSKA Moscow.

Also, I forgot Ike Diogu. Take Ekezie out of the starting line up and put him in there.

At 8/14/2008 8:48 AM, Blogger Sweat of Ewing said...

Anyone else watching the US-Greece bout right now? Bosh, Wade, and Kobe are absolutely sick right now, and whoever is at the scorer's table has probably halved Bosh's rebound total - he's all over the place, just way too fast for any of the Greek bigs to stay with.

Also, Schortsanitis looks like if Shaq swallowed Shaq and pasted on his fu.

At 8/14/2008 9:48 AM, Blogger stopmikelupica said...

JR Holden is Russian because Putin said so. In EuroLeague teams, there are strict limits on how many non-native players you can have on the team (so to prevent purchasing a team full of American 2nd tier players). So often you'll see players born in other countries awarded citizenship, so they can play on the team without taking up one of the two "foreign" player slots.

Also see: "Radoslav Makris" (hint: he was on the Raptors last year).

wv: xlthnr: Ex-Lithuanian, now Russia.

At 8/14/2008 10:15 AM, Blogger Ramo2653 said...

No one outside of hardcore Bucks fans realizes that Mo is best at being a 3rd guard off the bench. It plays to the type of play that he is (shoot first & streaky) and its why the Bucks were halfway decent with the TJ/Mo combo from a few years ago.

At 8/14/2008 10:28 AM, Blogger T. said...

@ramo - see Mike James as starter vs. Mike James as bench guy, you mean?

At 8/14/2008 10:38 AM, Blogger Quantavius Sturdivant said...

nesterovic, chris kaman, holden...you can really be a citizen of anywhere at this point. the georgian women's volleyball team that beat the russians was brazilian.

nice work by the bucks on unloading mo's killer contract. sessions is a worthy starter (as well as a threat to his coach's single game assist record.)

At 8/14/2008 12:27 PM, Blogger jawaan oldham said...

sml---the 90s Knicks were NOT the original version of the Spurs minus the rings. For one, the Spurs are defined by quiet, smooth, efficiency. The 90s Knicks were none of the above. They were loud, rough, and fucking crazy. Sure, they won ugly, but the Spurs don't win ugly.

Being the original Spurs would have also required the 90s Knicks to be well-coached, and every single fault in the way the Knicks played from 91 on was Pat Riley's fault. Rick Pitino, no genius himself, had the Knicks playing wild, freewheeling (proto-FD?) ball, and for some reason, Pat Riley decided to take an athletic running team and play glacierball. Riley's entire post-Lakers career has been a monument to stubbornness, and conservative idiocy. His one ring since then was for a team essentially coached by Stan Van Gundy, and handed to him by referees.

It's weird, as a Knick fan, that I felt the need to clarify this point because I thought it was unfair to the Spurs. Liberated fandom is beginning to take hold . . .

At 8/14/2008 7:53 PM, Blogger guidetokulchur said...

am i the only one who had mo williams on his fantasy team two years ago and sees him as a triple double machine waiting to happen?

At 8/16/2008 12:10 AM, Blogger Michael said...

Hold on, did Olajuwon never play in the Olympics for Nigeria? I guess the Nigerian team just never qualified for any of the Games. Otherwise, he would have played for both Nigeria and the US (which he did in 96).

But nonetheless, he did play for the Nigerian men at one point, only subsequently obtaining American citizenship and playing for the US.


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